Thursday, June 19, 2008

Jack's Muslim Jokes Part 26



Redneck Muslim Jokes, Part 2

1 comment:

Redneck MUSLIM Jokes Part 2 … said...

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you wear a Towel on your head.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you're a Fools Fool and your too foolish
to know it.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you’re the ‘Village Buffoon.’

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have two wives entering menopause
at the same time you have two entering puberty.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your mother has on more than one
occasion asked you to stop playing ‘Shit Packer’ with your sister.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your children play hopscotch in the
local minefield.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your favorite holiday is Halloween.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you’re learning to speak PIG Latin.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your wife is so young she can stand
up to give you a blowjob.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your idea of having fun is putting the
whole family in the old truck and go to McDonald’s for lunch.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your wife is so blind she sucks your
big toe and she can’t tell the difference because the size is the same.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you collect road kill.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you celebrate death, any death,
anywhere, anytime.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have called the Psyche Hotline
on more than one occasion explaining your ‘Out of Body Experience.’

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If just the mention of a suicide bomb
attack makes you giggle uncontrollably.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you drink, steal, watch naked women,
gamble, and fornicate with animals.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have a Peanut Butter Sandwich
concession stand at the main desert oasis, on the east west Nomad Camel
Caravan Trail.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you practice walking backwards to get
away from the U.S. Marines.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your son always urinates on the ‘Prayer Rug.’

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you went to Iraq and ended up a
Shiite shit snifter,

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you and your Camel have a spitting
contest every morning.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your son is a ‘Cross Dresser.’

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you won the local Tribal ‘Farting’ contest.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your 10-year-old son constantly draws
pictures of pigs with wings flying around in a blue colored sky.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you think Jihad is a campfire song.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If when you have sex with your wife you
call out your mother’s name.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your breath smells like Camel Farts.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you reload your own AK47 ammo.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your children eat from your neighbor’s
garbage dump.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have to ride your Camel into town
to buy Goats Milk.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your home smells like a toilet.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you were nursed by an Orangutan
as a baby.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your sister is your daughter.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you still owe money to the taxidermist.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you carry a picture of Barbra Eden in
her Genie outfit.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you brought back sand from Afghanistan
for your Tent Floor thinking all your Muslim neighbors would be jealous.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you actually play with young boys but
tell your friends you like young girls.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your family spends most of the day on
the street begging or selling their body for sex.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you brag about how well you can read
your ABD’s.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you converted to Islam because you
thought the prayer rug was a ‘Magic Carpet.’

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you consider Campbell’s Pork and Beans
in a can to be a gourmet food.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have to take Viagra just so you
won’t pee yourself.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If all your neighbors envy you because
your black, a Muslim, and live in Saudi Arabia. In other words you’re a
niggers sand nigger.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If when the Serbs started their ethnic
cleansing you ran into a Catholic Church, used some holly water, put on
a Christian Cross, said 10 Hale Mary’s, and started shouting death to Islam.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you pick the goat cheese from your
only front tooth in public.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your 10-year-old daughter’s asshole
is shiner than a mirror in the sun from you tonguing it out for hours on end.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have a ‘Prayer Rug’ concession
outside a Hebrew Temple.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you make custom designed ‘Out Houses.’

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your daughter is so popular with the
men in your tribe she walks around with a mattress strapped to her back.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you lay naked under the stars at night
and masturbate.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your religious sec involves getting drunk
and peeing on your neighbor’s tent.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you wake up several times a night in a
cold sweat in fear the U.S. Marines are coming over the next sand dune.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you’re a wannabe warrior from Malaysia.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your unmarried mother had sex with
a rabbit dog just before you where conceived by your father.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your father, brother, and you all have
had your sister in the same night.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you caught your 12-year-old son raping
your 7-year-old neighbor’s daughter, and you pulled him off so you could show
him how to do it properly.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If when you saw the U.S. Marines coming
into Iraq you were standing on the highway passing out Christian Bibles.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have stolen at least two or more
women who are already married to other men.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your oldest son’s name is Abdullah
Dickhead bin Omar Dickhead bin Mohammed Dickhead.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If when your daughter got married half
of the wedding gifts were live pigs because everyone knows how much
you like roasted pork.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you’re secretly learning to speak Hebrew
to fulfill your life long ambition of becoming an Israeli Spy.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you use pages from the Koran as a coffee
filter.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you’re still making payments on your
daughter’s nipple rings.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you actually believe there was a Prophet
named Mohammed.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you sold your daughter for a box of ammo
and 2 cartons of cigarettes.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your wife masturbates with an empty
mortar shell casing.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your idea of having fun is to throw
a live goat on an open fire then piss on it to try to put it out.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If all the men in your family have a
Bar Mitzvah.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your sister lost her virginity before she
grew tits.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you shaved your head bald, got a tattoo
of a ‘target’ on the back, and have a T-shirt that says ‘Death to Americans.’

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you were one of the ‘Idiots’ that stole a
toilet from Saddam’s palace but you have NO indoor plumbing.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your mother secretly has a tattoo of
Osama bin Laden on her ass.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you masturbate while watching two
Camels fucking.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have pictures of Jewish girls
sunbathing.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have been barred from Mecca
because on more than one occasion you have trampled some old guy
to death at the end of the Hajj.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you think a religious pilgrimage is
blowing yourself up.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you work in a hospital cleaning
bedpans and giving enemas because it reminds you of home.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you’re the only family in your neighborhood
that wears spurs while riding a Camel.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have a T-shirt that says, “I can’t go
to Mecca because I just volunteered to be a suicide bomber.’

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you envy the Buddhist Monks who set
themselves on fire.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you actually believe Islam is not the work
of the devil.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you play with monkey balls.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If all of your wives faces look like the ass
of a camel.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you and your son argue over who gets
the inflatable women (full size blow up porn doll).

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you threw a party when you heard
Michael Jackson converted to Islam.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you frequently masturbate at an
outdoor café.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you live in a mobile TENT Park.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you had a head injury and when they
x-rayed your skull it was empty.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If the inside of your Mercedes smells like
Camel Dung.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you live in the African Jungle, carry
a spear and shield, and wear a turbine.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you drive a high speed rubber raft and
try and convince the U.S. Navy you’re just a fisherman.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you chased a snake into a woodpile
and tried to have sex with it.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you haven’t come to grips with the fact
you’re a boil on the ass of the world.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you, your wife, and the goat all sleep
in the same bed.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your so ugly you look like your face
caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a knife.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have flunked out of more than
two flight schools.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your son enjoys too much of being
a Goat Herder.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If more than one member of your family
has been to the doctor’s office because they keep putting the new vacuum
cleaner hose on their penis.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If Santa Claus left you the Anarchists
Survival Book.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you’re the local tribal wine maker.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you can talk a five year old out of her
virginity.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you secretly have a Christian Bible
under your pillow to obtain redemption for your terrorist ways.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you march in the streets for no
apparent reason.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you eat shit and bark at the moon.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you believe in Genies (jin).

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have the only Redneck Pork
Skins hawker concession cart stand in Mecca.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you suggested that the round dome
on your Mosque be reshaped like a turbine.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you talk the talk but you have never
walked the walk.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your brother blew up a Mosque
thinking it was a Jewish Temple.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you had the word ‘Mohammed’
tattooed on your penis.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you string Goat Horns together
for a door chime.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you randomly dig in the desert
looking for unexploded landmines.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have currency from more than
10 Muslim based nations and it doesn’t add up to enough to buy a box
of ammo.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you wear a patch over one eye and
tell your friends you’re an Islamic Sand Pirate.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you masturbate while watching your
daughter pee.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you installed a ‘Wolf Whistle’ on your
Mercedes Benz.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your family vehicle is a wooden
cart with a 3-legged donkey.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have to use both hands to
count to 11.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you watched the local Cleric have
sex with your wife and it turns you on.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you were in the Iraqi Army when
you saw the U.S. Marines and changed your uniform to civilian clothes.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you sniff cocaine from an empty
AK47 shell.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If your desert water bottle is laced
with hashish.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you have on more than one occasion
entered the local masturbating contest.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you’re the only Muslim pig farmer in
your town.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you still have payments left on your
Al Qaeda tattoo.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you bought a cat because you wanted
to try some strange pussy.

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you’re a member of a special Muslim
religious sec called ‘Holly Shit the Marines are Coming.’

You May Be A Redneck MUSLIM If you think cock fighting involves
two drunken Muslims swinging their dick at one another.